I want you to imagine for a moment the immense frustration that one must experience as a full fledged serial killer.
Psychology has made it abundantly clear that much of the negative behavior we encounter is in some way a ploy to garner attention, but the consequence of a serial killer’s behavior establishes a severe dichotomy- the drive for attention is compounded by the fact that the secret must be protected for the killer’s own freedom. Putting aside moral and ethical considerations for a moment, it makes for a curious situation. In one’s drive to be recognized, they have an imperative to avoid any semblance of a true and honest spotlight. As a result can satisfaction be fully realized? Data trends would suggest not- most experts believe the desire for attention is insatiable and creates a cycle of behavior that goes on and on and on.
I often feel frustration myself (I can assure you this will not manifest in serial murdering) in that no aspect of my personal or professional life affords a truly creative avenue for expression and exploration of the things I hold close to my heart. I have a sneaking suspicion that pursuing a hobbyist creative outlet professionally would make me a slave to routine and order, thus killing my joy. Furthermore, my attention-adverse disposition makes it personally difficult to attach my name to the content I create. Worse still is the idea of shamelessly promoting myself and my work.
My perspective and exploration of Jiu Jitsu will most commonly manifest itself in design, illustration, photography, film, writing and conversation. I hope, using my background and influences, that I will create something worthwhile and interesting that others can share and relate to, while keeping the burden of attention solely on whatever it is that may grow.
If this all sounds too self-indulgent, too self-deprecating, or too self-anything-else, perhaps you are correct, or perhaps Sink Swim isn’t for you. I am willing entering a fishbowl, with the understanding that while the glass is strong enough to keep outsiders at a distance, they are spectator’s to my world nonetheless.
Enjoy the ink and cloth.